Adoption Is Not Plan B

Nick Horton

“Do you want to be parents, or conservators of your genetic code?”

I swallowed hard. Did he really just say that?

Well. What DO I want to be most? A parent, or a replicator?

Gosh. Why did he have to say it that way?!

Soul-quake

A seismic shift had occurred in my soul when I read those words from Dr. Russell Moore in his book, Adopted for Life. My wife, Amy, had been talking about adoption for years. I always said something terribly foolish; “I want to have one of my own first.” Yes, I really said that. I had no clue what adoption was, what it meant, or what being a parent was all about. Now, that one quote from Dr. Moore’s book dug itself into my heart, as it shook my preconceptions of parenting and adoption. Indeed, what did I want to be? Is parenting simply a biological process of replicating our genetic code?

Is parenting just biology? Or, is it more than biology?

Jesus was adopted

Jesus. Adopted. Let that sink in for a minute. The God of the universe, who took on flesh and was born of a woman was adopted.

Joseph found out Mary was pregnant with someone else’s child and wanted no part of the marriage. Joseph was willing to divorce Mary quietly rather than stone her to death for infidelity. However, God sent an angel to tell him that the baby she carried was conceived of the Holy Spirit. (Matt 1:18-25) So, Joseph trusted God and adopted Jesus. He became the earthly father of the Messiah through the ordinary means of adoption. He put claim to the child as his and raised him as his own. We have no record of what that looked like or how he could possibly raise his Creator. Yet, we know he fulfilled his vows to Mary which meant he laid claim to Jesus as father.

My wife and I have no clue what parenting our child*, yet we know there is a child we are called to parent. We don’t know what that will look like, but we know in Ethiopia is an orphan who will need parents, and we are those parents.

Not second-best

Recall the beautiful truth that flowed through Paul in Romans: “For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” (Romans 8:14-15.)

There is no entry into the family of God except through adoption. Christ, our guarantor of a better covenant, began with adoption and ended in resurrection glory. So too do we who know Christ begin our life with him through adoption, and one day we will be resurrected in glory.

Adoption is not second best. Adoption is not an after thought. Adoption is God’s forethought. Adoption is God’s plan from before creation for the redemption of his elect.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places,  even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. (Ephesians 1:3–6.)

We follow Christ

Christ was adopted by Joseph. God adopts us through faith in Christ. So then, we adopt to picture the gospel. We adopt to give homes to children who don’t have them, as God adopted us and gave us a home with him. (John 14:2-3)  We adopt to have more children. Whether children enter our family through my wife’s womb or someone else’s, they are our children. Fully accepted and loved.

This is but a shadow of the eternal reality of Christ’s adoption of sinners by his blood. He chose us, we did not choose him. He bought a people for himself and gave them a father. Adopted by the Spirit of Christ for the glory of God by the substitutionary atonement of Christ.

Hallelujah! What a Savior!

—

* Whenever the adoption completes which is a long way off. Did I mention how painful and long adoption can be? Another time.

Today in Blogworld 01.03.14

Mike Leake

The New DesiringGod.org

On New Year’s Day Desiring God launched their new site. If you haven’t seen it already take a look.

Don’t Waste Your Weakness in 2014

Also from DG is this great reminder from John Piper. This might seem like a strange resolution: “In 2014, I encourage you to identify and exploit your weaknesses for the glory of Christ.” Read on.

How Should the Gospel Change the Church’s Celebrity Culture?

I think you’ll be hearing more and more about the church’s celebrity culture in 2014. This article from Mathew Sims needs to be part of the conversation.

Some Thoughts on the Reading of Books

Al Mohler likes to read. (And the pope is still Catholic). He gives six tips to being better readers.

I really love Lutheran Satire. I could spend a decent hour watching all their videos. Their recent one is one of my favorites:

Pray For Your Daughter: 31 Day Challenge—Day Three

Mike Leake

Day Three: That God would be magnified in her heart

Psalm 34:3 (ESV) Oh, magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt his name together!

Whether your daughter is young or old, there are many things in her life competing for her time, talents, affection, and worship. So much of her energy can be wasted on the wrong things that this world has to offer. Even good things, that the Lord created to point us to praise for Him, can become bigger than they should. Let’s pray for our daughters to flee from idolatry and into the arms of Jesus–the only one who can satisfy her heart.

Magnify yourself Lord, in my daughter’s heart. Draw her to you and pursue her with your unfailing love. I pray that she will see that any joy and pleasure in this life is nothing compared to what you offer, and is meant to point her to you. Help her to see you working in her life and to praise you, even if it hurts, while she is struggling with following after your will versus hers. Holy Spirit please empower her to praise you at all times. Lord, help her to worship you, the Creator, over your good creation.

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Bethany Wilhite is mom to Abigail age 6, and wife of Michael who is the meterologist at SouthernIndianaWeather.com .  Bethany attends True Vine Baptist Church in Ferdinand, IN.

Raising Them For Another

Mike Leake 3 Comments

“When the child grew up, she brought him to Pharaoh’s daughter, and he became her son.” –Exodus 2:10

“I can’t let my baby go! But I also can’t let him be slaughtered by this wicked Pharaoh.” The thoughts poured through young Jochebed’s mind. She did what any mother in her situation would have been forced to do; she kissed the forehead of her new little bundle of joy, put him in a basket, and hid him by the river. Actually she couldn’t bring herself to do it. She had her little girl, Miriam, do it for her.

That day would have been filled with tears. And likely worry and wonder. What would happen to her little boy? Would he survive? Would she ever see him again? If she did would he forgive her for abandoning him in a river? Surely, he would. The questions like unwelcome visitors kept rolling through her mind.

As these thoughts pierced her heart, Jochebed noticed young Miriam returning home. Was that a smile on her face? “How could this child be smiling?” Jochebed thought to herself. Miriam’s trot turned into a sprint.

“Mama! Mama!”, she catches her breath and tries to contain her smile. “The baby…the baby…he was…he was…!” 

“Yes, Miriam, what is it…?”

“He was picked up by the Pharoah’s daughter…”

Worry comes across Jochebed’s face. Surely, she will turn her baby over to the Pharoah to be slaughtered. “Oh, young naïve Miriam”, her mother thought. She tried to feign excitement to save Miriam’s little heart. Then the excitement she was trying to fake became real.

“Mama, that Egyptian lady wants you to come and nurse the baby. He gets to come back home!”

Jochebed knew now that she could trust the Lord. He had protected her little boy. And he had blessed her mightily—she would now be paid to nurse her own son. And when he grew he would be safe in Pharoah’s own household. This reality answered so many of the questions that haunted her only hours before, but it also brought pain to her heart. One day she would have to give up her child. She had three years…three years…to mother this little boy before he would call someone else “mom”.

My “Three Years”

I know that I took a little liberty with that story, but I don’t think it is a stretch of the imagination to see it playing out in a similar fashion. As I write this my little girl is three. I couldn’t imagine being put in the position of this Hebrew mother. How could I raise her for another?

Then I realize that whether it’s three years or eighteen years, this is what I’m doing. I’m raising my little girl for another. Just as this Hebrew mother had a very small window to mother her little boy, so also do I have a small window to father and disciple this little one.

I imagine that Jochebed crammed every day with discipleship and parenting of her baby. She likely treasured every moment that she got to nurse this little boy. I’m sure that she had her days when she forgot that three years was coming up. His tantrums would have still frustrated her. The questions about his future would still come. But all of it would be focused. It would be marked. Marked by the number three. He’d be given to another.

Some day my little girl will walk down an aisle and she’ll get a new name. She’ll become wife and that will be a more important word than daughter. I pray that I spend my “three years” in earnest. Loving her. Praying for her. Discipling her. And modeling for her what it means to be a man that loves Jesus.

In a couple of days you’ll be reading a statement in our Pray For Your Daughter challenge. My friend Nick, has us pray this, “Oh God, capture her heart” That’s what I’m praying for my little girl every day for the rest of her life.