Am I Saved Even If I Don’t Think I Am?

Listen as a fearful man tells us his story:

I started out so wonderfully in my walk with Jesus. You know how I was addicted to various drugs, and woke up to a different woman about every night? Well, once I turned to Jesus all those desires went away. I couldn’t get enough of reading the Bible. I was at church every time the doors were open. I couldn’t get enough.

It wasn’t just the things that I stopped doing, either. I found in my heart an ability to love people that I’d never loved before. I had so much peace. For the first time in a long while I was able to sleep—and actually rest. I don’t know how else to say it, man, I just couldn’t get enough of Jesus. If you’d ask me a few months ago where I thought I’d spend eternity, I’d have told you with great confidence…I’m going to heaven! But now…now…well, I’m really not sure….

I haven’t read my Bible in weeks. My passion has grown cold. I just mouth the words on Sunday morning. I find myself almost falling asleep at the pastor’s sermons. And I’m starting to doubt. I’m starting to doubt whether God is real…maybe this whole thing was an illusion. I’m getting scared, man. I’m getting urges and desires I thought were gone. My love for Jesus is growing colder every day it seems and the world is start to look attractive to me again. In fact…well…I’ve already stumbled a couple times. And, I’m just not sure anymore. I don’t know how in the world I can still be saved.

So what do I do, man? Am I still saved? I sure don’t feel like it?

Incomplete Answers

How would you counsel this fearful man? There are two ways that I’ve heard counsel given that I think are incomplete.

Option 1: Just tell the guy not to worry about it. You remind him of the decision that he made a few months ago. Explain to him the doctrine of the eternal security of the believer—and how God holds us to our decisions.

Tell him the story of the guy who went around to the back of his barn and drove in a stake. And how every time Satan tempts him with doubt he goes back to that stake and reminds the devil of the decision that he made so many years ago. Encourage this fearful chap to do the same thing—drive in a stake and go back to the day of his conversion.

While, there might be some help to doing this—I don’t know that the Bible really encourages us to stake our hope on a past decision on our part. The Bible seems a bit more concerned with establishing our present faith (even if weak) in Christ. The Scriptures encourage the falling by reminding them of the fullness of Christ—not by pointing to a time when they had a good frame.

Option 2: Tell the guy he probably isn’t saved. The logic goes something like this: Faith is the certainty of things unseen. True believers have assurance. If you lack assurance you aren’t a true believer.

If the guy isn’t saved it’s pretty obvious that he wants to be. And so tell him that what he did previously must not have been legit. Have him repeat the gospel and then go back to something similar to the first option.

While I appreciate that this option takes the question seriously it ultimately fails too. I’ve seen people really wounded by this type of counsel. They are told that Christians never doubt. When seasons of doubt come, they assume that they must not be saved and so they’ve got to do it again. In the end, they fall prey to the same error as those in the first option; namely, putting the surety our salvation on the strength of our faith and confession.

Newton’s Biblical Answer

Both of these options were present in one form or another in Newton’s day. And he tore holes into both. For those who opt for the first option Newton compares the believer to an infant:

I allow that while faith is weak, there may be little solid comfort…But though an infant has not the strength, activity, and understanding, which he will attain when he arrives to the age of manhood, he is as fully possessed of a principle of life, while he is an infant, as at any time afterwards.

Newton is following Richard Sibbes in helping the struggling believer find his assurance in the finished work of Christ and not in the level of his own faith—a weak faith can indeed lay hold of a strong Christ.

Newton also takes to task those who boast of assurance and speak as if they are freed from all doubts and fears:

To hear persons talk much of their assurance, and that they are freed from all doubts and fears, while they habitually indulge proud, angry, resentful, discontented tempers, or while they are eagerly grasping after the world, like those who seek their whole portion in it, is painful and disgusting to a serious mind…we have great reason to fear that they do not understand what they say, nor whereof they affirm.

Rather than finding security in our own boasting of assurance Newton, rightly, believed that our frames and comforts are up to God. Right doctrine alone is not enough in the dark night of the soul. For “notions of truth, destitute of power, will not keep the heart in peace”. What is needed is the Spirit to give us assurance.

The key to assurance is to look much to Christ and not to self. I think Newton would answer this fearful man by asking him if he is trusting in Christ today. Does he believe the gospel today? Even with a weak and feeble faith. If he does—then even if he doesn’t have assurance that day will likely come. In the mean time he should humbly continue to seek the Lord—looking not to his frames or his feelings but to Christ.

Conclusion

In a letter that we will look at in depth in a few months Newton says this of assurance:

I call it assurance, when it arises from a simple view of the grace and glory of the Savior, independent of our sensible frames and feelings, so as to enable us to answer all objections, from unbelief and Satan, with the Apostle’s words, “Who is he who condemns? It is Christ who died; yes rather, who is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also makes intercession for us.” Rom. 8:34. This, in my judgment, does not belong to the essence of faith, so that ‘B’ should be deemed more truly a believer than ‘A’, but to the establishment of faith.

God often matures our faith by withdrawing a pleasing frame (or feelings of assurance). In this we are put in a position to place our whole hope in the work of Christ and not in our own faith in that work. And so if you find yourself wrestling with whether or not your faith is legit—listen to the counsel of Newton, and look to Christ alone.

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